From the base of the mountain we could see the entire trail to the top. As New York natives, this was something entirely different. My husband and I frequently hiked the Adirondack mountains with our 5 children. In the thick and winding trails one can hardly see one hundred feet in front of them, let alone the entire trail!
We were at the trail head of Koko Head railway trail, outside Honolulu, Hawaii. The railway path traveled straight up the mountain, not a tree, bend or curve got in the way.
As we hiked, we always knew exactly how far we had to go and how far we had come because we could see the whole trail.
As a mother, I’m constantly wishing that I could see the whole trail! If I knew what was coming I could make adjustments to prepare my children for life’s difficulties. But I’m constantly looking back and thinking, ‘If I knew then what I know now, I would’ve done X, Y and Z differently.’
I was recently reading through Solomon’s prayer to dedicate the newly finished temple in 2 Chronicles. At the culmination of Solomon’s prayer, fire came down from heaven and the Lord’s glory filled the temple so much so that the priests were unable to enter. In response the Israelites bowed with the faces down in worship and praised God saying:
‘For He is good, for His faithful love endures forever.’
2 Chronicles 7:3
After witnessing an intense and frightening display of God’s glory the people praised God for His faithful love.
If I had witnessed fire falling from heaven, I would’ve yelled something more like:
“Oh Lord, you are so powerful! Please, do not consume my wicked heart in your wrath!”
Of all the things they could have yelled out, they praised Him for His faithful love! This causes me to pause. I encourage you to pause to.
In the day to day journey, I want to make all the right decisions regarding my children. I want to have fun with them. I want to teach them. I want to guide them. I want to take them on adventures and show them all kinds of wonderful things.
But despite my best efforts I know I’m going to mess up. I know this because I already have, plenty of times.
But I remember God’s faithful love again.
His faithful love, overshadowing all His other qualities. His faithful love overshadowing Israel’s sin and iniquity.
When I reach the top of the mountain and look back at my motherhood journey, I hope that despite the mess-ups and wrong turns, the thing that overshadows it all is faithful love. God’s faithful love towards me and my faithful love towards my children.
2 Comments
What I love most about this post is not feeling so alone in our motherhood experiences. Of course I too wish I had done some things differently and hope that any scars created are forgotten, or minimized. As teenagers the kids are a little less forgiving, so relying on God’s forgiveness is super important. My mother tells me that it will all turn around someday!! 🙂
Good perspective Pam. Isn’t it a beautiful thing how forgiving children are? Though I’m only just entering the teen years with my kids, I find I’m relying on God’s grace in a way that is much more desperate than before!