It is no exaggeration, I love summer. Where we live in upstate New York, summer is the most beautiful time of the year. So naturally, I try to pack in every possible activity.
Unfortunately, by the second week of summer, I remember that we still have restrictions and limit: I still have 5 children, they still need to eat 3 meals a day, my house still needs to be cleaned and the clothes still need to be washed.
I’ve more then once ran our family and myself into the ground by week two, trying to cram in everything at once.
Since the rest of the year runs according to school and sports schedules, we love the freedom summer offers. However, as much as I love the idea of spontaneity, I’ve realized I actually crave the guidelines of a plan. A good plan. A plan that helps us not crush the simplicity of summer by over-scheduling and prevents us from being exhausted before July even begins. A plan that allows space for us to grow personally and as a family.
Here are five guidelines that have helped us keep summer simple:
1) Leave space for rest days.
My oldest daughter’s favorite thing about summer is all that she doesn’t have to do. Nothing will kill the joy of flexibility like a packed schedule. Be sure you’re not taking trips back to back or planning a trip for every weekend. I’ve learned the importance of leaving space for recovering and having “down days” the hard way.
Along with trips and vacations, be careful what activities you sign up for. In years past I’ve felt bad we couldn’t put our kids in camps. To make up for this I thought I should at least sign them up for sports clinics or local State Park activities. This may be the way to go for your family because of your work schedule or other needs, but if it’s not necessary, choose carefully what you commit to for the summer. If you have a busy school year and summer is the perfect chance to make time for sports or music activities then go for it. But if you’re already doing those things during school months, consider taking a break from scheduled activities in the summer.
Some time ago I was complaining to my mother about being overwhelmed by all I had going on. Without a hint of sympathy she said, “Whelp. You need to learn to say ‘no,’ otherwise you have no one to blame but yourself.” Nothing like cold, hard truth from a mother. Learn to say “no” and you’ll thank yourself later. This is not my nature, so I have to work extra hard on this one.
Once those recovery times or down days are established do what you need to in order to protect them. Maybe you’ll need to commit to keep your pjs on all day, or not put on make up. Maybe you need to stay off all social media. Do whatever ’s necessary to keep the day restful.
2) Set Summer Goals.
The summer, just like any change in season, is a perfect opportunity to reevaluate priorities by deciding what you’d like to do with your time. What does your family’s summer lend itself to that other seasons don’t? Maybe it’s more time to read, maybe it’s more time to go on hikes or begin a new hobby.
Have each family member write out some goals they have for themselves this summer. The goals sheet I created for our family has four different categories of goals listed along the side of the page: Physical, Spiritual, Reading and Self-Discipline.
Some goals may require a lot of effort and priority. One summer my daughter decided to run a three-day camp for the kids in the neighborhood. It took a lot of planning and commitment on my part in order for her to reach this goal. Despite the high level of commitment this goal needed it was successful. This year will be the third summer in a row she has offered her camp. Another summer one daughter wanted to learn Japanese. This took little to no planning. In her spare time she wrote out and practiced some Japanese via library books and computer games.
As a mother I also like to set goals for our family as a whole. In what ways would you like to grow as a family this summer? How could you make the most of your time together? Because we tend to stay up later in the summer, bedtime routines are short and rushed. Each summer, I have a goal to worship together as a family just before bed one night a week. This doesn’t always happen, but as a goal it helps keep our priorities and our time together valuable despite the shift in routine.
3) Institute a Weekly Cleaning Day.
A day of cleaning doesn’t sound simple or fun-filled, but hear me out: as the routine of the week rolls out the window, the dust bunnies roll in. You will find great comfort in knowing that when that special cleaning day comes, all will be back to its original state.
A weekly cleaning day is a time for more intense cleaning than what ‘straightening’ up in allows for.
For the past 3 summers our cleaning day has been Monday, which I affectionately call Madness Monday. (It is not so affectionate for my children.)
On these days everyone is expected to begin their chores by 9:00am and work until they’re done. The younger two pair up with the older two and the toddler follows me around. Each set of children has a few rooms or areas to clean completely. They clean those same locations for two weeks in a row, then rotate.
Though this is not my kid’s ideal way to spend a summer day, they’ve become efficient and are typically done by noon or soon after. Plus, I’ve taken to doing something special on Mondays when chores are done.
4) Create a Default Plan.
If there is nothing on the calendar for the day, what is the default plan? If your children are anything like mine, without a default plan they assume each day holds endless possibilities! They will wake up with a hundred and one ideas and expectations for that day alone. This is overwhelming to say the least.
A default day is the schedule they follow when nothing else is planned.
For example, maybe the schedule is:
Simply a lazy morning with breakfast cleaned-up by 9:30, outdoors or free time until lunch, two hours of afternoon quiet time for naps or reading, back outside until dinner and then a movie or show before bed.
Essentially, when there is not a plan, what is the plan?
5) Remember Simple.
Summer is an opportunity to take on a different rhythm and embrace a different pace. It’s an opportunity to connect with each other in new ways, to grow in new areas and to explore new things, be it books, places or people.
But with all that opportunity, remember that some of the most beautiful moments are the simplest ones.
Have fun this summer sitting on the floor to play with toys. Enjoy the breeze in your hair as you swing on a swing. Stop along the way to spy on a bird. In between the “must do” things, embrace the opportunities to simply be.
2 Comments
Fantastic!!!
Such simple reminders and I love the idea of a plan for the days when their is no plan! I need this!
Thanks for sharing friend!